There are some harsh realities that people do not generally talk about openly, but I think these truths are worth sharing so we can have realistic expectations in the dating world.   There are 3 things we all trade in the “open market” when dating: (1) sex appeal (2) money and (3) influence. The sexier, richer or more well-connected you are, the more appealing your package is to a potential partner, and therefore, the more power you will have, and the greater your options will be while out on the prowl.

Guys are quite visual by nature, so chances are a woman’s sex appeal will matter a lot to them. Meanwhile, women are less visual, and can be much more forgiving in the looks department, assuming other qualities they care about like emotional availability or financial security are present.

Men that want to have a family are going to target women (aka “breeders”) between the ages of 25-35. Those that are done having kids, however, will probably focus more on women between the ages of 35-45, which are peak years for women with careers, and often many are still very attractive.  Now, the more power a guy has based on the package he can offer, the pickier he can be, but unless you are the total package, it is simply not realistic to set your sights too high. Same holds true for women– those with great sex appeal, money and influence, are rarely going to date down.

No one ever wants to settle, but you also can’t try to over-reach– that will get you no where. When you are out in the market, you have to be aware of the assets you have and try to sell the value you add to a partnership.  Make the most of your time by realistically investing in  others that will compliment your package.