I admit that I wanted to understand what all the buzz was about, so I finally downloaded Fifty Shades of Grey onto my Kindle and zipped through it, even though I totally couldn’t relate. The Grey character (the dom) I totally got, but the Ana character (the sub) not at all. Nonetheless, there are a couple of great take-aways that came from this book:

1. Explore your limits–  I do think that you need to test your limitations, and as you mature you do need to own up to which way you have a tendency to lean.  It’s about finding your own comfort zone through trial and error.

2. Own It.  Don’t try to be someone you are not, and make no apologies for who you are.  It’s particularly important to recognize if you have a dominant and competitive personality– because the fact is you will clash with your own kind when trying to form an intimate personal relationship.

Trying to date my own species was a complete fail that I never fully understood until I read this book, but now I do. The power struggles never end, and my inability to fully relinquish control would never sit well with someone similarly wired like me.

To find balance, which I have been striving for a lot in the last few years, I think you need the ying and yang forces in play. Of course, that comes with a whole other set of challenges– because you need to appreciate the virtues of someone that is a different breed. I’ll save that for another blog, but gaining 50 shades of clarity while enjoying some good recreational visuals is 50 shades of fantastic as far as I’m concerned.