In physics, one of the main principles is that matter does not cease to exist, it simply transforms depending on its surrounding conditions. For example, if you take water and boil it, it turns from liquid into a gas, but it doesn’t cease to exist. If you freeze it, it will become a solid, but then if you transport it to a warmer environment, it can melt and become a liquid once again. No need to be a mensa to follow this basic example of how things can and will change depending on what they are exposed to– so why is it so hard to believe that this same rule of logic can apply to love?
Each person is a mass of energy, with vastly differing potentials. There is in my opinion a direct correlation between a person’s energy level and his/her capacity to love, which I view as a byproduct of our own energy. Again, applying another basic physics principle, we all accept that energy cannot be destroyed, it only transforms between the two forms of energy- potential energy (which has yet to be used) and kinetic (which is in motion.) In human partnerships then, when two energy sources meet and are able to feed off of each other in a healthy way, their kinetic energy creates a love that is simply magical. But can this realistically be maintained? It is a question I am often asked, and I believe it depends on both energy sources, and the environments they are exposed to over time.
If we can accept that nothing in life stays in a permanent state, then we have to recognize that it is the same with love. For example, the love I felt for my unborn son 10 years ago is nothing compared to the love I now feel towards this growing human being with his own distinct personality, thoughts and creative ideas. However, it is equally apparent that just as our feelings can become more intense over time in a positive way, energy can be re-directed down a dark path.
The key to survival, as Darwin pointed out, is adaptabilty. In life, as our environments constantly change, we see all living creatures modifying their behaviors to stay alive. We need to apply this same concept in our relationships- if you want to stay together, you need to make sure that you are both absorbing positive energy from one another. Negativity needs to be addressed right away– find a solution to issues before they turn into crisis situations. If you allow your relationship to suffer too many hits at once, it will either implode or explode. (An imploding relationship sinks quietly like the Titanic, whereas the explosive ends go off like a nuclear bomb leaving massive damage everywhere.) Neither one is a pretty end.
But as I stated earlier, there really are no endings. It is all just redirected energy and the transformation of matter into a new reality. Embrace change, not just in science but as part of your every day life. The whole point of science was to help us make sense of the world, and it does make sense– if you just keep applying the law of physics. And in the meantime, enjoy making that “kinetic energy” with the one you love. 🙂
By Regina A. DeMeo, Esq.