Starting over after a long-term, committed relationship comes to an end is never easy. The sooner you can work through that anger and/or sorrow, however, the sooner you can move to a better place emotionally, where you start to see the new opportunities that lie before you. In that vein, it is key that you make some newly single friends fast– not because misery loves company, but so you have people in your life that feel your pain yet they won’t let you wallow in self pity. Together, you can find ways to laugh about some of the ridiculous things you may have said or done as your relationship unraveled, and they can help you find the humor in some of the absurd things the other person may have said or done in an attempt to get one final dig in before things ended. Why is this so critical? Because laughter is the best medicine to heal a broken heart.
Creating a new social network, finding friends to share the holidays with you, learning to date after being out of the game for ages– it can all be done. Plenty of us have had to do this, and together we can make this process a lot less daunting for others. The past 8 years, I haven’t just talked the talk, I’ve had to walk the walk, and sadly it is only by walking a mile in my clients’ shoes that I’ve come to fully comprehend the full impact of a divorce, as well as the challenges of starting over. Luckily, with the help of many, I not only found the silver lining on some stupid cloud hanging over my head– in fact what I discovered was more like a beautiful rainbow after surviving a monsoon that almost killed me. Alone, I would have died.
New Beginnings is a wonderful local organization that helps recently separated/divorced individuals create a network and find useful resources. I recently featured this non-profit on MMCTV, and here is the link to that segment: