Let’s face it, after age 35 we all have some baggage that we carry with us. Our life experiences shape who we are, and there’s nothing to be ashamed of– we’ve all made mistakes, and as long as we’ve learned from them and not allowed ourselves to just dwell in the past, then all is good. Now the key is to find someone with compatible baggage.
Think of it this way– if you are about to embark on a journey, do you want a companion with an empty suitcase? That would just be weird– and I also don’t think you want to travel with someone whose suitcase is full of dirty laundry, that is just going to require a lot of extra and unnecessary work for both of you. Indeed, the goal is to find someone who has done his/her laundry, nicely folded his/her clothes, and is now ready for an adventure.
Unfortunately, you may find that some people lack certain travel skills– and I mean that both literally and figuratively. Some people are just home-bodies, or they may not like exploring beyond their limited comfort zone. Some may be afraid of planes, or loathe long car rides, or perhaps they just lack the resources– time, money, or energy to go on an adventure. These are all harsh realities we must learn to accept and move on.
At different stages of life, it’s normal that we will want different things, and no one is right or wrong for wanting what s/he thinks is necessary to find happiness. The key, however, is going through your own baggage first so that once you’ve done your own inventory you can recognize someone that aligns with your vision for the future. It may take a very long while looking for that needle in the haystack– but I believe it’ s worth it in the end when you find that person whose suitcase perfectly coordinates with your own.
By Regina A. DeMeo, Esq.