We have all heard the phrase that "opposites attract, but they don't last," and maybe that is true-- but it doesn't have to be. If we could accept each other's differences and appreciate our varying strengths, I think couples that can compensate for one another's deficits may be the strongest pairs ever. In many of the healthy relationships that I have observed over time the women tend to be the ones that dominate at home-- making sure the kids' needs are met, that all social plans are confirmed, that the family sticks to a schedule, and that there is some order to family's overall life. Meanwhile, their partners are much more laid back-- having sometimes no sense of time, no preference as to having a plan or just staying home, and no apparent care as to whether the laundry is properly folded or not. It seems crazy, but maybe that is what provides balance to the overall family life? Those of us with control tendencies may try to go too far if left unchecked-- so maybe what actually makes the most sense is to fall for the easy-going, carefree types (obviously without going to an extreme). My son, my brother, and my father are all carefree spirits that can just roll with whatever happens-- 3 generations of men with the [...]

We all have our issues, maybe some more than others, but not everyone has self-awareness. Sometimes, unfortunately, it takes a catastrophic event to trigger a journey inward, such as a divorce or death in the family. Even then, not everyone will want to do the hard work to delve into the past and figure out their feelings. Most people in fact are wired to avoid conflict, and they would prefer to forget the past, just enjoy the present and try to not stress about the future. Then there are those of us who are just gluttons for punishment...Over the past few months, I have immensely enjoyed finding my family after all these years-- especially my baby brother, who I was never sure I would find. Yet, the journey to find him was filled with peril-- the risk of being rejected, or accepted at first only to be later abandoned, the possibility that no one in the family would understand me or love me, or that perhaps in some way I have disappointed them all by not meeting their expectations. These are all normal fears-- perhaps completely not rational, but emotionally quite real. Thankfully, I understand where these fears stem from and know how to cope with them, and so it is that now more than ever I believe that if [...]

In this economy, we all have to focus on the basics, but with children it is also important to make sure we allow for some special moments at amusement parks, beaches, spending time at the pool, going to sporting events, zoos, museums, and shows because those are the memories that kids (and their parents) will cherish forever.Each year of my son's life, I have made him an album capturing some of our favorite moments. This year's album, however, is extra special for it is filled with faces of loved ones I had always longed for and wondered about, yet for over three decades I lived with only one photo of my father, and none of my extended family.This past week, I took my son to visit our newly discovered relatives. Watching my son bond with everyone brought me more joy than I ever could have imagined, and finally having some one-on-one time with my long lost cousins is something I will always cherish, although the thought of all the years we lost does pain me.I realize I will not always be here to remind my son about the entire story that has unfolded over the last seven months, but hopefully enough will be preserved of this beautiful home-coming story that all those involved can carry some piece of it to [...]